Harold and Maude

A suicidal teenager befriends an optimistic old woman who teaches him about the joys of life

Grade: A+ (97/100)

Director: Hal Ashby
Year Released: 1971

After I watched Harold and Maude, my mother asked me if I "loved it". "Absolutely I loved it," I said. She nodded. "Everybody loves Harold and Maude." I understand why she said this because it seems as though everybody who's ever seen this film (excluding some famous film critics) have really adored it. I think of this film really as the epitome of a cult classic because it's weird enough to have gone unappreciated by most prominent critics at the time of its release, but charming enough to be beloved by generations upon generations of weirdos, loners, and people with very dark senses of humor alike.

One thing I love about movies is that there are some you just know you're going to love from the second they start- sort of the effect of the Star Wars logo and "DA DUMMM", or The Godfather logo and the sad theme-music trumpet. They send shivers down your spine and make you ready and full of anticipation for the film. From the first scene of Harold, played by a dower, subtly moving Bud Cort, moving down the stairs of his mansion and hanging himself, I knew this was going to be a movie that stuck with me for a long time. One time I sat next to a little boy on a plane who was reading a book and he told me "Every time I read a book it stays with me like a memory my entire life". That's how I feel about movies as powerful as Harold and Maude- they stay with you like a memory, thick in your skull and your nerves and they don't go away.

I completely understand why people don't like Harold and Maude- it's weird, dark, constantly overstepping boundaries and taking risky moves that make viewers uncomfortable. But it's also really touching and, in its own ways, beautiful; though the lessons are cliché and the Cat Stevens score seems out of place, it's lovely and dark and sad and moving in the brand of suicidal poets like Dickinson and Plath. I will admit that the sexual relationship between the 20-year-old Harold and the 79-year-old Maude disturbed me, but in many ways it's less freaky than Harold's suicide stunts, or even his negligent mother's attitude towards his well-being. We can't decide the ways that love works, or for that matter the ways we can be inspired to change our perceptions and attitudes; Harold and Maude explores that mystery with powerful results.

There are some people who really walk the line between attractive and weird-looking to me, and I felt as though Bud Cort perfectly sums up that conflict in my eyes. I find him attractive not so much in a beautiful way, but more in the way of a moth being drawn to a light- his portrayal of Harold, a seriously troubled young man who elaborately stages what may or may not be real suicides, is fascinating and nuanced with every facet of his struggling emotional state. It's evident that his suicide attempts begin as a method of attention-seeking but have transgressed merely into banal acts of boredom, done in an effort to irritate his mother and scare people away who had any chance of getting close to him. His fascination with death and the morose is melodramatic in a way appropriate to the film, however the bits of fantasy allowed in his suicide attempts blur the black and white divide of reality and imagination- while the viewer understands that several of his attempts are fake (such as cutting off a fake hand and setting a dummy on fire in front of dates), others we cannot be so sure about, particularly the hanging, drowning, wrist slitting, gunshot wound, and, at the very end, driving the car off a cliff. When seeing these gruesome acts, which would surely end a person's life but never seem to end Harold's, it is at the same time the over-the-top emphasis on how far a child will go to seek attention from his parent, and also part of the fantastical charm that makes Harold and Maude such an absurd (but uniquely excellent) film.

Classic contrast between light and dark as a metaphor 

Obviously the histrionic, melodramatic antics of Harold's depressive acts make a sharp distinction from Ruth Gordon's happy-go-lucky Maude, a free-spirited old woman whose friendship with Harold establishes her as cult film's oldest (literally) Manic Pixie Dream Girl. But unlike those lame male protagonists of other MPDG films, Maude does not exist solely for Harold, but rather herself. Her decisions override his always; she is dominant to him and in being so teaches him about the world he is too afraid to explore. She is not an enigma but rather an open anthology of wisdom. And unlike those movies, Harold does not necessarily go at the world with a bright attitude following her death- instead he is resigned to live with her memory, possibly happier, possibly more fulfilled, but definitely more convinced at the cruelty of nature. He is ashamed at himself at the end because he has allowed his guard against the cruel world to be let down just to be hurt. There is not a happy or sad ending, just an ending, and we must accept it in the way Maude accepts her own fate.

Honestly I don't have a whole lot else to say about Harold and Maude except that it really moved me and that I definitely cried watching it, not just because I'm sensitive but also because it's a powerful movie about opening up to somebody and allowing yourself to be loved. That's not always an easy thing to do, especially for people who feel isolated and misunderstood; sometimes it can feel like there is nobody out there to love and identify with. Life is sticky and complicated and works out in ways people may reject or find unnatural or even revolting, like the concept of a young man and an old woman finding love together. But at the end of the day what we learn from Harold and Maude is not just to allow yourself to have an open mind about life's goodness, but to allow ourselves to love, be loved, and let others love in their own ways during the definite span of our short lives.

I watched Harold and Maude on Amazon Prime Video for free, but it can be rented on Amazon Instant Watch for $3.99, or even purchased for like $5 online or, I'm sure, at your local video store.